Centering our conversation around how we Strengthen our Core physically, emotionally, and spirituality, CEO of True Conversations Meghan Enriquez talked this week with
Creator and CEO of Keep Me Tight www.keepmetight.com, Shameeka Hunt.
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Meghan: "What was your relationship with your body before having children and how did you get to this place where you are now where you respect this vessel for what it is now and that it will never be what it was?"
Shameeka: "There are some parts of my body that after having kids will NOT go back to pre pregnancy, but there are things that I can do to enhance the feel and look... which is personal. People would say Shameeka you look great you look fine. Until I believed that, it didn't matter... I was used to being a size 0 or size 2... Fast forward after I had my kids, between my 2 pregnancies I had gained over 80 lbs, for me that was oh my gosh! It does something to you mentally, physically and emotionally. I could not tolerate it. At six weeks after I had my son I was pushing him in a stroller every day for 5 miles, no kidding if you can imagine I had weight problems for my whole life I would have known how to handle it. So the only way I knew how to deal with it was to get on a strict nutritional and exercise regimen as I was healing. If I did not have that self confidence from my spouse, it would impact me much harder. "
Meghan: "Was it your routine before having children that you and your husband work out? Where does it fit in around the family?"
Shameeka: "With having kids, I had to learn to work around my kid's schedule. I learned that they wake up and are drinking milk at 5:30am and I know after that it was my best time to walk with them because they would go to sleep. You get to the point where you are tired of being tired. I made time, but it was hard at first because kids don't know. I have trained them that they know sit here with mommy but mommy is working out for the next 45 minutes, you can play, but don't bother me. If they see that is normal for me then they will jump up and start exercising too. I could have stopped when they were younger and were crying or pulling on my leg but I knew I needed to be that role model."
Meghan: "It is important to openly communicate and advocate for what you need, to ask for help. We all know friends where the wife doesn't feel her health is as valuable and feels bad for asking for resources or money to afford your health needs."
Shameeka: "I feel as a woman we are naturally the nurturers... if we as women become so tired so not taking care of ourselves we are not the best we can be and we are not the best we can provide for others. I have to think differently, but there are times and points and map out your time in the day to say when is ME TIME? When can I decompress mentally, physically and emotionally, even if I am in the bathroom or hiding in a closet somewhere. Sometimes in the shower is my moment of let me just breathe."
Meghan: "I know when my husband is taking that time. Did the trip to Target really have to take an hour to get toilet paper? I used to get upset about it but now I recognize that that is his way of excusing himself from the chaos and taking the time he needs. If that is what he needs then I respect if and expect the same respect when I need to take the time for myself. So what were you doing before Keep Me Tight?"
Shameeka: "I am engineer, and project manager... I am just using my engineering background to design and develop my own products and use it to help and assist others."
Meghan: "I am such a huge advocate for following what is in your heart and trusting whatever life experiences you have had up to this point have been there preparing you for that gutsy move or leap of faith. Instead of having to hire engineers you can do it!"
Shameeka: "I agree our experiences are in preparation for what is to come and I have learned to trust in the process. I know what my desires are but I don't know the end game. There is a process I have to go through to see the promises I expect. The process may be familial, emotional, spiritual, and physical. You find that this is bigger than me... We are all a part of a body and we all have our natural functions. What is your place, what do you do well, and don't be afraid to reach out for help. What I am good at I will give it 110% and what I am not good at I will reach out and find people who are great at it. I have had to step back, I am an impatient person. Going back to grassroots and process I have realized everything was for a purpose, it created positive change in my character which extends to my family and my business. I ask who can I bring with me on this journey and help elevate?"
Meghan: "That is the mantra of this decade we are all better together. Realizing your worthiness and value is not about having to be everything it is about honoring what you are really good at and what you are not good at and surrounding yourself with the other pieces, you do not have to BE the whole thing to create the whole thing. You just need to find people who want the same thing and be a part of this mission."
Shameeka: "That is very humbling to say 'I lack this.'"
Meghan: "There is a core around each of us and that is what we need to plug into. All of the creation we see out there on social media are a result of our core's expansion. We can only control what decisions we are making in our own family unit and with ourselves. We may have a big broad conversation around the race issues in this country for example, but at the end of the day I am only concerned with how do I choose to treat other people and teach that to my children?"
Shameeka: "My husband reminds me that when we see people on TV that is only a small fraction of people and most people who are creating change you don't see their stories. At the end of the day my family is number 1. My business may pass one day but my family will alway be there... What am I doing now to create longevity and generations of wealth. I cannot do that if I am impatient."
Meghan: "'I have started to ask my husband, 'So I feel like I've grown in this area, do you think I've grown in that? I need an outside perspective, you're the one living with me so tell me the truth. Sometimes he says yes you have and sometimes he says, 'No, no you haven't changed at all.' It is so important to have someone with an outside perspective and that support. The spouse can act like a trampoline to bounce you back up after a fall. What do you do to grow your spiritually or lean on when you need to lean on something that is not tangibly there. I feel like going into business and having children is such an opportunity to grow your spirituality."
Shameeka: "One thing that has always been there is to attend Church weekly. We are biblically based so that is what we lean on. My trust is not in man but I believe in God. When I have my quiet time I lay out my heart, my emotions, my needs. I need to pour out and I need to be fed as well so I can function in the physical realm. For example I had been doing these Farmer's Markets with a moisturizer we make, and one morning it was heavy on my heart and it wasn't feeling right. It took me recognizing that the time out there isn't building my spiritual bond and family bond."
Meghan: "Following your feelings, that is what it would say if I had a little plane with a banner behind it flying around the country. That is the most powerful, directional, 100% about making the right decision... when you follow your feeling it is a 100% guarantee it is right decision because this includes if you need to learn something you need to learn it NOW and you will be led to that mistake NOW. The best way to serve yourself is to make those mistakes now. Your feelings will lead you them."
Shameeka: "The faith part goes deeper when you know I cannot do this by myself. It is almost like exercising, sweating and physically drained, I can do what I can do and knowing the rest is not up to me."
Meghan: "When you are making all of those tough decisions around your family and your business if it moves you away from your core you can tell. How do you spend your quiet time to check in about your decisions?"
Shameeka: "It can be music, in the car, it is about a conversation in your mind. Are my thoughts pure, positive. When we talk about being a parent, a business owner, a citizen, we can choose to welcome in only those thing that are uplifting and empowering. And I had to learn that when people give me feedback sometimes and understand it isn't always coming from a negative place, that their intentions are good."
Meghan: "When I came up with TRUE Conversations I had a hard time narrowing down to who I wanted to serve NOW, and I decided on parents because I realized if we can establish a new culture of being purposefully transparent and uplifting and empowering, the way that they act and become will trickle down to their children. The children will see all of these tools in the toolbox so that our kids have a different experience to be able to realize that for example, an assumption that when someone says something it is coming from a negative place vs assuming the best about people. So tell me about your reason behind KeepMeTight, what do you do?"
Shameeka: "I want to be a catalyst of change in people's lifestyles. Whether the women are pre or postpartum, and in athletics, when we talk about the core it is really getting down to the foundations. For me I went through that drastic change emotionally and physically because of how I looked and how my clothes didn't fit.... KeepMeTight is just a tool to use with your every day lifestyle and combine it with your fitness and nutritional regimen. I had c sections so I lost a lot of that muscle memory. I can lose some of that lack of self love and self doubt and transform that into what do I have control over and what can I do to be a better me? As women we are very hard on ourselves. When I step into and say, our core is everything, that is a center that gives us strength that give us alignment and strength and stability. That is what from a physical, emotional and spiritual aspect I transfer into a physical product. We are going to strengthen your lumbar, and intra-abdominus. I want to serve as a tool to push you and empower you. When I empower you then you have a decision to make for yourself, you can't look back and say 'I didn't know.'"
Meghan: "I completely hear you because I also wanted to solve the problem of people saying I didn't know that that was an option whether it is around birth, health, postpartum, careers. Just like when you work with someone in strengthening their core their limbs and joints ache less, when we develop our core it allows how we are interacting with people exuding into our life to also be less stressed, less painful... we all get to a place in our life especially postpartum when we want to reclaim ourselves, and feel whole again. With your experience you get it, and can extend so much compassion and understanding to others. So to wrap things up, what is one thing you think we can implement into our family life and help start teaching our children about the importance to attending to our CORE?"
Shameeka: "My kids are 4 and 5, and to ask them 'What are you feeling?' That boundary of having some freedom to express who you are because there are some things that are not life threatening. We can always talk through something even their mistakes."
Meghan: "If we continue to hover over them we do not allow them to learn how to trust their own guts and that can be devastating. What is one thing you would tell yourself if you were to jump to your future self?"
Shameeka: "Let go and trust in the process. Now I feel like we need to go have girl time and a glass of wine!